In between

When I first set out to create this blog, I wanted it to be spontaneous.  An urge--something that made me take to the computer because I had such a strong feeling I just had to share it with the world.  Today, I am writing again--at the urging of my sister.  Who reminded me that I had not written in a very long time.  Nearly a year, to be exact.

So, this really is an urging.

The whys and wherefores don't really matter about why we do or do not do something.  It is the doing that makes the difference.  And, right now, my doing is dog-tired.

I watched EAT.  PRAY. LOVE. a week or so ago.  A delicious film overflowing with wonderful travel sequences from around the world.  Most know the basics of the film.  Women in search of herself.  While in Italy, Julia Roberts aka Elizabeth Gilbert is conversing with her new friends. A robust discourse ensues over words which they think represent cities and then words which represent themselves.  Our women in search of herself has no word.

That is me.  A woman in search of a word.  I am considering that as a title for a new blog.

My word at present is really two words.  In between.

Business is slow and I am grateful, I think.  Since I was 15 I have worked--and I mean worked.  At a feverish pitch like the world was coming to an end.  Focused, driven....now I am in between.

It is a strange and foreign place.  And, since arriving here, I am settling in.  Albeit slowly.  The natives seem to be a little less restless.

Unwinding has taken awhile and I have never been good at being idle.

But, I am hopeful and enthusiastic that this in between place will yield an excellent word.

For now, in between suits me just fine.

Joy

Usually, I have been at my computer fast at work.  As the owner of a small business, work consumes me.  Today, I decided to write for me, first.

Attended a Unity lecture last night.  Don Miguel Ruiz.  Author of "The Four Agreements" and now "The Fifth Agreement."  I had never seen him in person and he had his sons and a woman who studied with him and all of them spoke at some point during the lecture, which was of course fascinating and eye opening.

But, what urged me to write this a.m. was the concept of Joy.  The apprentice who spoke last about her studies with Don Miguel was simply consumed with joy.  She was giddy on the stage and I could not help but notice how people in the audience started to move about gathering coats to leave because the end was near.  Rather than relish and share in a moment of pure joy.

When I left, I wondered if this outward expression--pure, raw emotion--her Joy had made them nervous.  As adults, we don't often show our joy in the way that this woman had.  I went to sleep wondering why we don't do that.  Why do we save or stuff our joy?   It is far easier for us to express sadness, anger--our negative emotions.

I awoke to the Daily Word.  Yep...you guessed it.  JOY.  The daily word was all about joy.  We needn't wait for joy.  It does not depend on achieving certain goals.  You don't have to graduate from college to feel joy.  It is a state of mind and accessible to us at all times.

So, today, I hope you feel joy.  But, more importantly, I hope you are able to express it.

I know I am going to try my best to do the same.